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  • Dance Junkie

We can be friends, just not my timeline...

I stopped watching the news maybe over 15 years ago.

I still cared about the environment, the economy, my neighborhood, crime rates and etc...

But

What I noticed is that the news wouldn’t just report

They would terrorize

They would incite fear

Listening to the news would put me in a place of anxiety and fear

And

I just didn’t want to feel scared and anxious about things that I could not control

And knowing the difference is what keeps me sane (mostly)

But the news would promote

Worry

Anxiety

Fear

Stress

These are life stealers - they eat away at your core and often lead to disease because the body is in a state of dis-ease…

I hope you understood that

Many of us already have trauma from childhood whether it be bullying, abuse, molestation, death, poverty, neglect, abandonment…. Why add on to what we need to heal already.

So I stopped watching

My husband at the time would try to fill me in but I didn’t want that either.

There are outlets that allow me to tap in if I need to

So I pick and choose what I want to be informed about

Something that I have a hand in myself - something I can control

and I never turned back

Social Media is the sort of the same way except I have more control over what comes over my timeline.

I often see people complain about social media being negative and draining

Not mine - I cater my timeline

If something comes across my timeline that makes me feel any other way than happy, I will most likely unfollow and if you and I are not close - I will probably unfriend you.

Actually, during the Trump campaign and administration, I purposefully removed about 300 friends from my Facebook. Many of them were family. And it wasn't about their political beliefs because I can agree to disagree but it was the consistent justifying of racist, sexist, and discriminatory ideologies that drove me to a halt

cease and desist

I don't do arguing and name calling and I don't joke about rape, race or disabilities

wow - I guess I didn't know you like I thought I did...

Sorry - I am not sorry...


I do not get into the spirit of letting things slide because they are family

You can have your opinion

I can have mine

We don’t have to be FB friends to still be family

I can still love you

just from a distance

Way the freak over there please... I digress

If what you post is causing me to leave my happy space then yes I will pass.

Note* I will even unfriend or unfollow if the issue is all mine.

Okay let me explain

The number one thing I will tell during my clients during Breakup Boot Camp is you are to immediately enact - RADIO SILENCE

This is a term from the military which means what it says

No talking

No communication

Which absolutely means NO SOCIAL MEDIA - block them

Their family and friends (unfollow them - if you are not okay with blocking them)

And let them know you are going through something right now and you don’t want to hear from or about your ex…

This is absolutely necessary especially if you really loved and cared about the person and it is really over.

You need the space...

For your emotional stability, you must refrain from checking their page and whatever that means to you - you must do until you are over this person. This can take anywhere from 6 months to let’s see I am just now okay with contacting my ex-husband on social media and it has been 10 years. If you want more information on my Breakup Boot Camp please contact me on my home page...

It is an important step in healing, finding your own way and getting back on your emotional feet again.

Once or twice, I have found myself having an issue with someone who I was cool with in actual life. But the things that they were posting would annoy me to the point of being ready to tell them and their mama off. Or that friend who is messy - their posts are complaining all the time - or just flat out negative. So instead of enduring that feeling, I just stopped following that person - no love lost - your content was just not for me.

Social Media is a tool for most of us.

*We check on family

*Reconnect with old friends

*Play Games

*Laugh at Memes

*Connect with new people who share a similar passion

*Build our businesses

*Find a space to be ourselves

It does not have to be a place where negative images and news follow you but you must put in the time to set it up for you. If done right - your social media can be a haven full of positive perspective, fun, laughs, and most importantly a break from those stressors that are always waiting for us outside…

If you really want to make a new year - new you, follow people who inspire you, and those that will make you laugh. I hear that the DJ Dime is pretty inspirational and funny sometimes too....


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